when the tears gonna drop

i tell myself that i'm an aquarius gal.. aquarius gal can cry easily.. so i no need to hold my tears..
i tell myself that even i tears, it doesn't mean that i am weak.. even if i'm really weak, i cannot just let it be..
i have to pursue myself.. to act strong.. because nobody that i can depend on, except my own self..
people around me will leave me one day.. even if they won't.. it doesn't mean that i can trouble them..
i don't want to be a troublemaker.. but i always be.. guilty..
just leave me alone.. let me bear everything on myself.. until i cant breath and just let me go to the hell..
be a devil.. with no tears.. with a strong & cruel characteristic.. stop being bullied (even by the god).. and change my world..

then.. the tears which gonna drop just now.. dried..